Both of you have been with me throughout this ordeal.
Both of you knew what happened.
Knew how i coped with it.
In a way, you both have grown to be my lifejacket.
Supporting me through life.

I don't think they know how much they had helped.
Being with them gave me little breaks which i need.
The only time i had to feel normal other than being at work and at home.
Breaks from life.
So that i can feel normal.
Now both of them have their own lives and i am so happy for them.
They too deserved so much to be happy in their lives.
Its been a long while for them.
They can't be my cocoon forever.
And they shouldn't be.
I am happy that they both each hold on to a little happiness.
I just need to find my own.
Everyone has ventured out of our little protective sphere.
Except me.
I don't have the strength to find new cocoons.
Even going out with people to be sociable takes effort.
With the both of them don't take that much effort because they knew.
I cannot imagine having to go through reciting my problems and my life
to find myself a new life jacket.
Its time to stand on my own i think.